Do You Know What You Want?
When we work with magic, chances are it is to achieve a desired outcome that we believe is unattainable otherwise, or at least that we have tried to achieve by other means but couldn’t get through to the other side. The journey toward what we want is often littered with obstacles—moments in time designed to help us re-evaluate our circumstances and decide if what we wanted is really meant for us, or if we have what it takes to go the distance.
Recently, I talked about making an open door to opportunity spell for my sister and provided a list of everything someone would need to complete that spell. Admittedly, I was a little rushed that day and didn’t give the post the proper care and attention it truly needed for one to perform that spell properly and wanted to adjust here a little bit.
Any time I create a spell for anyone, I test it on myself first to make sure it works. I want to know exactly what mine and the recipient’s intentions should be, where the energy will flow, what the effect will look like, even down to the best day to perform the spell (keeping track of moon patterns when I’m pushed to perform a spell; usually there is an at least somewhat significant cosmic event happening at the same time and I’ll note that for future use). In this way, I can ensure the spell works as expected and no one is left disappointed.
However, there is one other independent variable that disrupts the effectiveness of a spell that is solely in the hands of the recipient: knowing what you want.
When I performed this open-door spell for myself, I knew what I wanted. And the spell worked. Within 24 hours, I received an opportunity to try for a job that I’ve been wanting since high school that I never thought I could reasonably get. And since then, this job has been perfect, and all the signs are there that this is where I am meant to be. Because of my overwhelming success, I felt confident in the spell’s ability to work, so I set up a time with my sister and performed the spell for her, as well.
Only this time, the effect didn’t show even though we gave it a full week to work. What happened? Well, after discussing it with my sister, we realized that she didn’t know what she wanted. She wanted so many different things, and some of them conflicted with others. She hadn’t yet narrowed down the baby-steps to achieve the path she wanted. So, she knew what she needed to get to a place where she could be financially independent, but kept thinking the spell would enable her to skip steps and jump to the finish line.
This spell isn’t designed to work that way. It opens a path, but you still have to walk through. You still have to do the work and get there, it just gives you the initial opportunity. In my sister’s case, she was so overwhelmed by the obstacles in her way that she forgot to focus on one. During that week, however, she was able to narrow it down and focus. Luckily, the energy of the spell stayed with her, and as soon as she made her decision and demanded what she wanted, she received it.
Sometimes, we see the door to opportunity open in front of us. We gaze into it like a portal to a dream, and revel in a fantasy that we hope will one day be our future. But standing in the doorway peering through won’t get you there. You have to step forward and reach out for what you want. Demand your desires, knowing without a doubt this is where you were meant to be.
I had a similar issue about a year and a half ago, which ended up being a defining moment for me that has gotten me to this point in my practice. I was sitting at the beach—I like to go when the weather is nice to interact with the energy of the lake, clear my head, and learn spiritual lessons. This particular day, I was overwhelmed with fear. There was something that I had wanted, encompassing all of my beliefs and studies over the years, and there was some move that I needed to make to get one step closer to it. This wasn’t just a brief dream or fantasy, either—it was something that I had wanted my entire life; I quite literally don’t remember ever not wanting it.
You would think if I was that dead-set on a dream, I would never question an opportunity to attain it. But, like it had been any time in the past I’ve had to make a larger step, I hesitated and became consumed with doubt—questioning everything I had known and believed. “What if this isn’t actually meant for me?” “What if I’m just crazy and everything I’ve experienced is just coincidence?” “What if every step I’ve made thus far has just been in vain, walking aimlessly toward an unattainable dream?” I was told to focus on what I wanted and to make a decision: choose what I thought I would be able to peacefully live with.
My choices were:
Walk away, assume I was just lost and confused, and continue on without ever knowing for sure—also not knowing whether or not I would be disappointing.
Try anyway, and at the very least, discover the truth.
I’m not content with living with “what ifs”. I despise them. Choice #1 would lead me to a path where I would always wonder if I made the right choice. At least Choice #2 would give me a definitive answer. If I was wrong, I would be able to move past that. If I was right, then I wouldn’t have to risk the disappointment. So I chose. And I continue to choose. Any time I’m faced with another doorway, I continue to choose to step forward, each step becoming easier than the last, and I’ve never regretted a single one.
Keep this in mind when you perform your spellwork. Not just if you attempt the Open Door To Opportunity spell, but any spell you attempt. You MUST know what you want, demand it with your whole heart, and be willing to do whatever it takes to get there. The energy cannot flow if it isn’t directed. The door will be open for you, but you have to be the one to walk through it.
Little bonus—the poem I wrote that day to process it:
I decided to face my fears
Because the fear isn’t the worst.
It’s the denial and the doubt,
Insecurity is the curse.
I realized I feared an outcome.
But at least I have to try.
The outcome is worse if I don’t.
I’ll be doomed in asking, “Why?”
The worst-case scenario
Is that nothing is real.
Which means, there’s no need to worry
It’ll give me room to heal.
…
It’s the ‘what if’s’ that will get me,
Leave me struggling to breathe.
It’s better learning to be wrong,
So for now, I’ll just have to believe.